I recently learned Jenny, the woman I have agreed to spend all eternity with, is not a fan of bubblegum flavored products. This could surely be grounds for divorce. All she needs is a life insurance policy for me to fully go through with it.

Bubblegum flavored things rule. Whenever I’d go to the dentist, which probably hasn’t been since the idea of a black president was a pipe dream, I’d always choose the bubblegum flavored foam stuff. When it comes to artificial flavors, bubblegum is unmatched because it’s already so unnatural tasting.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To her credit, Jenny does have rather good taste overall. The only time I question her is when something is regarded as “too sweet.” That’s the same as calling a sunset too beautiful or a mustache too gay. Everything has a purpose to go as extreme as possible. Mustaches let everyone know you’re best friends with your mother.

I do understand why bubblegum flavored products are a turn-off for some. The taste is unique and a bit sweet, sometimes even chalky. Chalky taste doesn’t bother me, though. My first job was as an elementary school blackboard eraser.

Jenny still does surprise me with some of her favorite flavors. Yesterday, we each had a Pecan Maple Frozen Coffee from Dunkin Donuts. Over the last two months, we’ve been a kick to drink their S’mores product. The irony is that Jenny absolutely despises marshmallows. Don’t tell her I told you this, but she actually runs an online forum insisting the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man was responsible for influencing 9/11.

For the most part, Jenny has good taste. Only her love of shrimp paste is something I cannot understand. While I can appreciate the Filipino treat in small doses, she attacks it like I do a good book…a good book made out of Peanut Butter M&M’s.