One of the first things Jenny and I did when she arrived in the US, after embracing each other and peeing at the airport twice, was make mango float. I can’t even remember which weekend we did this; if it … Continue reading How To Make Mango Float: The White Person Way
By decline, I don’t only mean the reclining theater chairs. Which is kinda cool, I guess…after you finished laughing at them. Friday after Thanksgiving is special for my fiance and I. That is the time we watched our first movie together–in … Continue reading The Decline of the Movie Theater Experience
It’s been a few weeks since Jenny entered the despicable lair known as my home. Less than a week after she did we were fortunate enough to stumble upon a Filipino grocery store. And by stumble upon I mean via … Continue reading A Taste of Home-ba
Kenny Rogers of Jackass fame… Not, but really…Kenny Rogers, the musician who is as American as voting for Donald Trump while giving a bald eagle a blow job, has a popular restaurant in the Philippines. It’s called Kenny Rogers Roasters. … Continue reading Kenny Rogers Has a Popular Restaurant in the Philippines Yet None in the US
One of the last meals Jenny and I shared together in-person (last weekend we shared a meal via Skype; she had oatmeal while I ate steak and potatoes due to the time difference–let’s not count this one though) took place … Continue reading C-Words: Cake Icing, Cheetos, and Coffee
The day before Jenny’s birthday we went to a barbecue place. It was a little different than places you’d find in the United States as it included many vendors and had no real walls or roof. You get to pick … Continue reading Transsexuals Cooked Me Pig Rectum
The last month I’ve felt some really big lows. Two Bees in a Blog hasn’t been updated at all because how do you write about your life when the only thing good in it is one day it will end? … Continue reading Depressed Eating vs. Celebration Eating
Marrying a foreigner means an opportunity to eat the food she grew up with. What’s normal to Jenny isn’t always something I’m too familiar with. Filipino cuisine includes lots of pork and soups. Growing up in America, most of my … Continue reading Are You Afraid of Foreign Food?
In a couple of weeks’ time, I’m gonna rob Timmy of his glorious bachelor’s life. To do that, I’d have to move away from my family–that means, I can no longer taste Filipino food as often as I want. Unless, … Continue reading Cooking 101: Humba (Or How to Feed Your Husband-to-Bee)
At the airport on our way to Jenny’s hometown we stopped at Starbucks for a place to sit and grab some food because damn it how can we resist munching? Jenny made it no secret from the start of our … Continue reading How to Eat Starbucks Tuna Pumpernickel Sandwiches
Jenny and I love desserts. Sometimes Jenny says the worst thing in the world when eating a dessert, which of course is claiming the treat is too sweet. Absurd, I know. How is something too sweet? Is the sky too … Continue reading How Much Mango Float Do We Need for Our Wedding?
If there is one thing Timmy is way better than I am at (except buffets), that is ice skating. During beecation last April, he showed me how it was possible to glide across the ice without injuring someone/dislocating a little … Continue reading What It’s Really Like to Ice Skate for the First Time
Puso is the Visayan word for rice. Puso is also the Tagalog word for heart. Jenny Bee speaks Visayan, an off-branch of the Filipino language. I guess it’s basically the English equivalent of Jive or just mumbling everything you say. … Continue reading Show Me Your Puso: Rice is Close to the Hearts of All Filipinos
Wow have I really not written anything here in three weeks? A lot has changed between Jenny and me since. For starters, we’ve completed the first step in being together forever/until she gets sick of me. Back in February we … Continue reading Petitions, Beecations, and Food Then More Food
It is no secret that Timmy and I are accomplished piggies. One proof of this is our constant preoccupation with food. Happiness is also very evident in our faces once we are served with a yummy piece of edible invention. … Continue reading Apple Cider Vinegar is Quite Expensive in the Philippines
Realizing I have only a few weeks to lose all of the weight I gained over the winter (which was probably just five pounds and it was the same five pounds I lost last fall before visiting Jenny) I’m attempting … Continue reading Bananas Are a Great Reason to Get Married
On February 15th I started a diet. On February 16th I broke it. I was doing so well, too! I made an Excel file and everything to track my food intake to ensure I wasn’t behaving like too much of … Continue reading I Started a Diet, It Lasted Literally One Day
Because Timmy won’t go through with the wedding unless I’m at least 120 lbs maximum. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Ugh, that is so impossible to do now. I can’t lose 100 lbs in two months! Timmy loves me anyway no matter what weight … Continue reading I’m Meeting My Fiancé in Less than Two Months So I Need to Lose Weight Fast
My plans to make this year’s Valentine’s Day a special one for Jenny and me are ruined. Well, not really. I just didn’t get to do everything I had hoped. First, since it is Saturday, we had to decide earlier … Continue reading Long Distance Relationship Valentine’s Day Plans Ruined: Redbox, Cadbury Eggs
Jenny doesn’t know this, but I came really close to dying when I visited her in October. Something I didn’t know about Filipinos is they love bones in their meats or at least they are too lazy to remove them. … Continue reading I Almost Died in the Philippines Then I Had to Poop
I don’t think a week goes by where Jenny or I promise the other we’ll go on a diet. It’s silly, really. We’re engaged. We’re supposed to get really fat now. This is the perk of finding someone to love … Continue reading Diets are for People Who Can Accept Breaking Promises to Themselves
Yesterday was Saturday which means Jenny and I enjoyed a full day together, but of course also very far apart due to ocean restricts and the length of my arms. We chatted, Skyped, and watched a movie. The movie was … Continue reading Tom Cruise is Really Short, I Remind Jenny of This Way Too Often
Jenny and I are not your typical couple. As you may have noticed by browsing around briefly, we’re continents and oceans apart. People will say to me “it must be tough, all of that distance between you two.” Whenever they … Continue reading And I Said, What About Breakfast in the Philippines?
You’re not a real Filipino if you don’t recognize what a lechon is. Even those who don’t eat it because of religious beliefs know how popular it is in the Philippines. For every celebration–birthdays, weddings, fiestas, Christmas, you name it–the … Continue reading Lechon a.k.a. Roasted Pig/King of all Filipino Foods