Look at that title. Have you ever seen something so click baity? We’re not having a baby anytime soon, as far as we know. It’s still a topic we think about and an event society pressures us into accomplishing. A person is only as valuable as the offspring they produce. Ergo, Will Smith’s life has been a waste.

A few months ago, an engaged coworker asked if I was feeling pressured into having a child. I explained to him that women bear the children therefore no one was pressuring me to give birth due to physical limitations of the male body. He later clarified that he meant having a baby with my wife. I told him “not yet” and we enjoyed the rest of our trip to the urinal in silence. Well, he enjoyed it. I know this by his constant peering and smiling.

Actually, he explained that his in-laws are pressuring him into knocking their daughter up. It’s not a problem I can relate to. I’m fairly certain the world can wait for my spawn. Don’t locusts need to appear first anyway?

Jenny and I would love it if a baby was practical. Right now, it’s not. From the financial aspect to simply having the time to care for the little one(s) we’re not quite there yet. Which by the way, NotQuiteThere@aol.com was my mother’s first incredibly depressing email address. Thanks, mom. For years I couldn’t tell of it was about your mental health or a dangly poop. Either way, the visuals are scary.

One day Jenny and I really hope to expand our family. In the meantime, baby time is like credit card debt: put on hold.

The time for a baby will eventually come. We’ll be more financially secure which then means we’ll also be more emotionally stable because MONEY. IS. EVERYTHING.

Having a baby would be great, though. We’d have something to dote over and love and cherish and take care of. For now, we’ll do this to each other as much as possible. Because, eventually, all of our time and focus will go toward helping an ungrateful child survive.